Putting the word out

Does anyone have, or know of someone who has, a baby swing I could borrow for a couple of months?  Anyone, anyone?  I would be forever grateful.

A Plethora o' Pictures

We are settling in nicely over here. Bryce has to make me sit still or I would go on whirlwind cleaning spree and end up back in the hospital. He has been so awesome taking care of the house and all of us. I couldn't ask for a better husband, and he loves his three boys so much. (I just might be tearing up right now, but don't tell anyone.) He goes back to work on Thursday, and I am going to miss having him around, and not even for all the laundry he's been doing. He did say to me the other day, overwhelmed at just the daily tasks there are, "I don't even know why you try! How do people do this every day?" I actually let him sleep in a little today, and being by myself with all three boys was, let's say, a little nerve-wracking. But I handled it okay! It will be nice when we get into a good groove and things start to be a little "normal." There are lots of pictures I've wanted to post since the day I had the baby, but obviously have been otherwise engaged. So I'm taking advantage of the baby sleeping and the boys watching a movie to post some.

Right before leaving for the hospital. We don't have many, if any, pictures of the four of us, and I wanted to get one. I'm waiting to lose a little weight before we get nice ones taken of the FIVE of us!

Me with my little men. So far I haven't hit any "postpartum" blues, but rather "highs," where I've never been so in love with my boys or my husband than I am now. I love this little family of mine so much that it's too overwhelming to think about sometimes.

I can't believe this giant four-year old was once a little baby.
Conversely, I can't believe that once little baby is now a giant four-year old.

Optimus Prime, before the Trunk or Treat

Bryce took them to the Trunk or Treat, and I guess in an effort to keep Fynn cool in his hot costume, Bryce kept it unzipped. I call it the 70s giraffe look - all he needs is some gold chains.

Story time. Sticking out their tongues like a baby kitten.

So far Fynn is handling the addition of Corgan pretty well.
He gives him the big kisses and says, "MWAH!"

I have never seen a child love babies as much as Ewan does, and I couldn't ask for a more loving big brother for Corgan. He looks out for him, talks to him, kisses him constantly.
Could the two of them be any more handsome?

Bryce's boss sent this Build-a-Bear to us. We weren't expecting it,
so it was such a nice surprise. It's very cute, and I love the personalized bib.

Cuddly. It's so hard not to squeeze him until he pops. He has changed so much already.
Why must they grow so fast?

Instead call me C-Dog

Mommy and Corgan are home now - a day early, bless my doctor's soul. When Bryce first called home to talk to Ewan after Corgan was born, Ewan's first question was, "Is he soft?" Since we came home, the boys' thoughts on the baby have been the following:

Fynn took one look at him in the car seat and said, "What's that?"

Ewan told me, "He's as cute as a baby whale" and "He's as small as my yo-yo."

Don't call me Corgy

Hey, it's Ashley. I am making the official announcement for Kelli and Bryce since they are otherwise busy at the moment. Their beautiful baby boy Corgan Kelly is finally here. He was born at 12:31 p.m. and weighed 8 lbs. 6 oz. Pretty sure he was 19 & 3/4 inches long but don't quote me on that. He is absolutely adorable and healthy as could be! I am quite sure that Ewan and Fynn are gonna be pretty fond of their new baby brother. He is already a champion eater and makes the cutest little squeals. When I left the hospital he was having his first bath and Kelli was resting comfortably. Here are a few of his first photos.

*** Just to let you guys know, I posted more pics of Corgan (what a SWEETHEART) over here! ***

The Forgiveness of Snails

Partially because I made him take a nap today, and partially because I think he can feel my tension, Ewan is still awake at nearly 11:00.  He's laying in our bed, where he usually starts the night, and I've been going in and out here and there to get things.  Just now I went in, and he had the biggest frown on his face and the saddest eyes I've ever seen.  I immediately became super motherly and asked what was wrong, which made him cry harder.  When he explained what was wrong, I couldn't understand him at all.  I asked him to tell me again, and he wailed, "I'm just so sorry I squished a snail one day!!!"  

I've assured him that the snail forgives him.

Nervous wreck

I spent most of today just finishing the laundry and concentrating on the boys since I'll be in the hospital for the rest of the week.  Ewan is so excited about the baby that he's incredibly hyper, which is totally cute.  Fynn of course really has no clue what's about to happen, although I've tried to give him some idea about a baby in my belly coming out.  We'll see.  So today we just played outside, did puzzles, watched movies and napped.  It's been a good day.

Except ever since I woke up this afternoon from our nap, I am so incredibly nervous that I'm sick to my stomach.  There's an off-color expression for how nervous I am, one my dad says frequently and one that I'm sure at least some of you have heard, but I won't say it just because many of you are also Mormon, and I don't know what your threshold is for offense.  Let's just say it involves women of the night and church pews.  I don't remember being even close to this nervous when I went in for my C-section with Fynn, but maybe I've forgotten.  And while part of it is thinking of what could go wrong, most of it is this weird thought that nothing is going to be right.  And I know it's just nerves, but it's still scary.  I just can't imagine actually holding the baby and having him be here.  Can't imagine it to the point where it feels like it won't happen.  Part of it may be that I've heard way too many stories recently of stillborn babies.  All afternoon I've been freaking out if I don't feel him move for a certain amount of time.  I know, I sound crazy, and I don't know what sparked it.  I just wish it would go away.

At any rate, we're getting things prepared here.  I packed the boys' t-shirts that Sarah and Ashley made that say "Big Brother" on them for them to wear when they go to the hospital tomorrow afternoon.  They'll be so cute.  If I could shake this melancholy panicky feeling, I'd be able to say that I can't freakin' wait!  I'll have Bryce post some pictures as soon as possible tomorrow.

For you children of the 80s

If you don't know or don't remember A-ha's awesome song Take On Me and its even awesomer video, shame on you, and right this second - visit this link for a refresher. I'll wait.

Wasn't that a fun 'lil trip down memory lane?

Okay, now enjoy this "literal" version. Hilarious.

(Posts like this are the risk you take when you are up with heartburn at 1:00 am.)

Babies and Boys and Boy Babies

Since Kristy and I are both in Primary, and are both having (had) babies this month, we were thrown a shower by all the Primary women, plus a few friends who were invited as well. Kristy definitely needed a shower more than I did, since she had her first boy after three girls, but I'm grateful I was included and it was so fun to get together with all these women and talk and laugh, and eat really good food. Luckily everyone there has had children, or some of the conversation topics might have horrified someone into never having them. I received many wonderful gifts, and if I was ambitious, I would post pictures of all of them! But I'm not, and sitting in this chair hurts my back, so I am just going to highlight two of my favorites. But thanks to everyone who was there, I loved everything.

If you remember this post, I was coveting both the baby and the hat. Luckily the baby was already in the works, and Julie offered to make the baby a hat just like the picture. This is the result! I love it so much, and CAN NOT WAIT to put him in it. I think Missy might have to come over with her camera... Thank you so much, Julie.

Okay, what are those, you think? Just plain hilarious, and having had two boys - definitely useful. (I tried to find Elisa's page on Etsy, but I lost the card.) For the purposes of this blog, I'll call them (drumroll) pee shields. Basically, you put this over your little boy's, ahem, penis, and if he decides to shower you while you are changing his diaper, these handy little tent-thingies keep the spray contained. Elisa knows we love pirates over here, so she gave me these pirate ones. I am SOOOO using these. Thanks, Elisa!  (*Update*  Elisa just wrote and said she found these on Etsy at bluejeanjess.etsy.com.)

And just for fun, a picture of Fynn's favorite past-time. Before the accident, he would play for hours with this plastic bat and a baseball, running around the house, making us throw the ball for him and trying to hit it. If baseball is on T.V., he is entranced. He really only likes to do it with Bryce, and he demands Bryce wear his baseball hat while they play. As you can see, the cast has not slowed him down at all, although his technique has changed a bit.

We went to the pumpkin patch yesterday, but unfortunately our pictures did not turn out so great. Most of the pictures Ewan absolutely refused to pose for at all. So I'll just post this one of him, happy in the bounce house. (Ignore the fact he's wearing a St. Patricks's Day shirt at a Halloween event. I tried to talk him out of it, but he is who he his and I let him be just that.) It was a very busy day, and he was very tired, so I think this might be the only time he smiled all day. But that's okay, he's still cute when he's not smiling. As long as he's not yelling. The other day as he was changing into his pajamas, I was just marveling at how lean and tall he is now - no baby body left at all. I couldn't help wondering, when did this boy move into my house?! It's so wonderful to see him growing up, but also sad. Time flies by much too quickly.

Small mercies

After a major comedy of errors involving having to go to three different gas stations in a downpour just to get some gas, in the process losing my gas cap, getting soaked while trying to get Ewan into his friend's house, driving half an hour in blinding rain, then descending four flights of stairs and walking two blocks with my waddling self and carrying a toddler with an extra splint's worth of weight, I managed to get Fynn to the doctor for his cast. He was very cooperative, and he even picked the color he wanted. The good news is that he is in a walking cast with a boot and that he'll only be in it for three weeks. Yay! The doctor said he shouldn't need therapy at all. The break is actually not in the same place, but apparently the older one was lower on his leg, which is confusing to me because I would have bet the deed on my house that the first break was right under his knee. But you can't argue with X-rays, and there is a clear crack under his knee this time, along with a healed crack lower down. Anyway, no big deal, everything is going to be much better than I thought and nothing I can't handle. So once this baby comes, I'll be back to my regular strength pessimism rather than my maximum-strength, hyper-drive pessimism. Trust me, I deal much better with post-Cesarean pain than I do with this back fiasco.
Pizza Face in his new cast. I couldn't get a better picture - it's hard to compete with the Backyardigans.

Moving on up

Today at my doctor's appointment, Bryce made the comment to the doctor that I just wanted the baby out.  He looked at my dates, and then said, "You know, you can absolutely move it up to next week if you want to.  Just say the word."  I was trying to be noble and told him I'd hold out, even as the voice in my head was screaming, "DO IT!"  But as we left, I kept mulling it over, checked with Bryce about his vacation time, with Ashley about when she was available.  And then I let the constant, major amount of pain I'm in make my decision for me.  Corgan will make his debut next week, on the 22nd.  That will get us through this busy week and leave us a few days to get organized and ready.  And I'm beyond ecstatic.  We can't wait to meet him.

Currently...

... waiting for my toenails to dry (hence this pointless post).

... breathing hard, recovering from giving myself a home pedicure with this belly as an obstacle.

... listening to my iTunes mix, currently on "A Forest" by The Cure.

... thirsty, but afraid the water I want will give me heartburn.  Which it will.

... gagging on the aftertaste of Tums.

... thinking the Super Hopeless Romance Blog chick is making a lot of it up.

... e-mailing Jenny and Sarah.

... wishing the Gossip Girl website would update with the new episode.

... wondering who is really going to care what I'm currently up to.

... regretting the serious over-abundance of fudge I consumed earlier.

... laughing at the fact that when I go in to have the baby, I'll be more excited about the epidural because I won't feel my back and leg pain than I will be about the baby.  (Not totally kidding.)

... wondering if Marianne can text-message because I lost her e-mail.  Already.

... wanting this and these.

... loving my cobalt blue toenails.

Ewan and Fynn

I had Missy over today, since she had the day off, and we don't ever get just fun weekdays to hang out and let the boys play.  We took them outside where Ewan found a rolly polly that he was very excited about.  But he lost it once we were inside, and he was very upset about it.  I told him he could go out front for two minutes and look on the front walk for another one.  The front walk that is two feet out in front of our house in plain view of all the windows.  I planned to watch him from said windows, but I never saw him come down from the front porch.  Missy and I were chatting, and I kept expecting to see him perusing the front garden to find some bugs.  Still didn't see him, so thinking he was right on the front porch, I opened the door to get him in, and he wasn't there.  He wasn't anywhere.  The front yard was silent, I called his name, nothing.  He was just gone.  My heart started to pound in my chest and my ears and I was about to panic when I look to the left, and that child was just strolling nonchalantly down the street from down on the corner.  I couldn't believe it, and it was a good half hour before my heart returned to normal beat.  He got a serious lecture, where I didn't sugar coat anything and I told him someone could have stolen him away from me forever.  He suddenly wasn't so worried about finding "doodle bugs" anymore, and I was fine with that.

Fynn is doing really well with his splint.  I'm actually having to watch him very closely to keep him from standing up.  At first, I was so daunted because I thought he wouldn't be able to do anything, but I was wrong.  As the doctor said he would, he figured out his own way to scoot around and it's basically just like having a crawling baby again.  Excepting the fact that instead of encouraging him to stand, we have to fuss at him constantly to SIT DOWN!  I should have known nothing would slow my wild Fynn down.  It'll be interesting to see how the cast affects him, as it will be a lot less flexible, and higher up on his leg.

Instead of crossing my fingers for the baby to come now, he has to hold on one more week.  I have so much going on:  doctor's appointments for me and Fynn, birthday parties, a baby shower, a baptism, the pumpkin patch...  Although I don't know how I'm going to handle that last one.  Walking isn't exactly one of my strong points right now.

It's a Hard-Knock Life

Needed: Live-in Nanny

You'd think we'd learn our lesson the first time. Tube-slide + lap-riding toddler = broken leg.  (For those who aren't on my private blog, there is a picture on Ashley's blog here.)  Yes, his leg is broken. The same leg. At the same park. Although not on the same exact slide, on one identical to last time.  This time, it was not me who bears the guilt, but Bryce, who feels about the size of a midget flea.  He had a surprise day off today, so we took the boys to the park, and little ol' me was just sitting on the bench nagging at Bryce, "Hold his legs in!"  Even Ewan kept saying, "Hold his legs, Daddy!"  And he did hold his legs.  Then I heard a crack, which I thought nothing of until I heard an unearthly wail coming from Fynn.  Last time, it was a "non-displaced" fracture, and basically the crack was so tiny that the doctor almost missed it on the X-ray.    He didn't need a cast or even a splint last time, although he was in one for the first couple of days.  I don't really know the difference, but the doctor this time said it was an acute fracture.  He's just in a splint now, but he'll be in a cast for six weeks starting next Wednesday.  I don't even know how he's going to handle it, or me for that matter, especially after the baby comes and I am caring for a newborn and a cast-ridden toddler.  Plus making sure Ewan gets the attention he needs with all this going on.  As of now, Fynn is mostly okay, the picture above is him letting us elevate his leg while he snacks on Cheez-its and watches Cars.  

And I want to give Sarah an outpouring of thanks for letting us drop Ewan off for the day totally last minute, especially after the fit he was throwing when we dropped him off.  But Sarah is so awesome because she is so patient and just assured me he'd be fine and shuffled me out the door.  Thanks for being so understanding of Ewan and his moods and for helping us out!  We love you!

Here we sit...

...in the ER because we are pretty sure Fynn broke his leg again.

Classy.

Remember when I blogged about this totally wonderful, unaffordable, beautiful-to-look-at-and-read-about-perfume?  Well, tonight perusing the same magazine in which I found Feerie Eau de Parfum, I found an advertisement for this monstrosity.  I guess we can call it the cheap a** ho version.  Pardon my language.  I just couldn't believe it when I saw it.

Odds and Ends

Well, Marianne had to leave me. It is very good for her and her husband, as he was given a very good job offer in Houston, which is going to make a lot of their plans and dreams possible, but sad for me because she had to leave so quickly. She was able to come today and say goodbye, and I'm at least so thrilled that she'll still be in the same state! She will be up for Thanksgiving, so we are both looking forward to that. Bryce and I plan on visiting in the future, as his brother is in Houston right now as well. I am so grateful that I was given this opportunity to reconnect with her, because I truly thought I had seen the last of her before that day she walked into my class. The best word for it is serendipitous - that we had not seen each other in six years, totally losing contact and wondering about each other, only to have her husband be temporarily training where they would be in our ward.

On a fun note, I am so excited about this robe I bought for the hospital.  Just the pictures from the hospital when I had Fynn were so blah and I was always horribly half-exposed by the hospital gown, that I decided I wanted to be as "pretty" as possible this time.  I've always wanted one of these pretty Chinese robes, and it was on Ebay for pretty cheap.  It took over a month to get here from China, but it was worth the wait because it is so much prettier in person than it is in the picture.  I can't wait to have it on while I cuddle with my new baby-man.

We're gearing up for Halloween over here, buying costumes much earlier than we normally would (i.e. two days before) since we kind of figure (hope) I'll go into labor at any time.  Wishful thinking or no, I want to be ready.  Ewan of course wants to be a Transformer, so we bought him the cheesiest little Optimus Prime costume.  And while it is so cheesy, he is so stinkin' cute as he's worn it all day for the past two days.  I just love watching him in it, because I know he feels so cool.  He loves being in that costume so much, and I don't care in the future - he can always be whatever he wants for Halloween.  I love seeing it spark his imagination, and just knowing he feels like the most awesome kid on the block.  He's been doing this constant transforming thing, even before we bought the costume, where he gets on his knees and curls up with his arms doing various things, depending on which Transformer he is being.  (We keep meaning to get it on tape, and I'll post it when we do.) He makes these sound-effects that sound exactly like the ones on the animated show and goes from "vehicle mode" to "robot mode."  It has also sparked his imagination quite a bit, and he got some of his toy bugs today and said they were "bug-bots," that they were good guys, and he had names for all of them and a story for them.  We do have pictures of Fynn wearing his giraffe costume, but I'll wait to post any until the actual day.  They are going to be so cute, and if I'm in the hospital on Halloween, which is the current plan, I can't wait for them to come trick-or-treating to my room.

Spotted on the way home from doctor...

... written in dust on back of 18 wheeler:

"I like boobies.  Driver can perform breast exams for free."

Melting Heart Quote of the Day

Ewan steps up to me and hugs my arm.  "I'll never not love you."

(And I do actually have something to write about, but I'll do it later tonight when I can focus.)

Quote of the Day

From a very incredulous Ewan:

"Daddy is very good at getting us money.  But every time he goes to work, I don't see any money..."

More than my share

I've been sitting here staring at the computer because I have something to say, and I wanted to try and be all eloquent and stuff.  But the eloquence is eluding me, so I'll just out with it.  I am so thankful to everyone who has been my friend and for all of you who have taken such good care of me lately.  I've never had a very good circle of solid friends before; I don't trust people and usually assume everyone really hates me.  But since we have lived here, and since I have reached real adulthood, my friendships have grown into something completely foreign to me:  REAL.  This includes church acquaintances all the way to my relationship with my sister Ashley.  It's so odd for me to be surrounded by people who seem to actually - GULP - like me.  I don't usually do well with accepting help from people, and when I had three simultaneous miscarriages three years ago, I would actually be angry when anyone found out about it or tried to offer any kind of condolence or service.  But I am now truly humbled by all the care I've been shown and service I have been given.  I have a hard time reaching out to others - either to offer or receive service - and I am so very grateful to everyone for all they do.  From my "Welcome, Baby" dinner a few weeks ago, to daily talks with Ashley and her loyalty to me, to Marianne kidnapping and treating me to a pedicure, to Missy making my blog awesome, to Sarah giving me a much-needed massage, to Betsy calling and offering to take the kids, to Erica escorting me to Austin, and Mary Ann's oft-impromptu babysitting, etc. etc. etc.  (And anyone who has listened to my incessant whining the past eight months.)  There are so many more examples I could include if I had a full-working brain right now.  But rest-assured you aren't forgotten and I love you all so much.  I wish I knew what I could do to offer more to all of you and make me more worth your time!  

So serious

They both seem very concerned about "The Very Lonely Firefly."

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